Two Dots

Time flies, it's going to be almost our one-year reunion. 

In this entrepreneurial adventure I've pursued since graudation, I've applied a lot from my b-school learnings at Stanford. Here are the top ones:

1) Communication and interpersonal dynamics -  I never knew, before this, how much building a startup is about recruiting, motivating, and coordinating talents with diverse skills, as well as resolving potential conflicts and deciding when to fire. All of this gets particularly hard when you are bootstrapping and have no salary to pay. I always thought it's about the product. But in reality, it's about the people, team dynamics, and communication. The various leadership and management classes at Stanford really helped me more maturely deal with all kinds of unexpected inter-personal situations. For example, I used to avoid confrontations. I learned that being vague is the opposite of compassion. I also learned the importance of congruence in communication. When you are unhappy about something, you need to express it in a congruent way. Saying it with a big smile often causes confusion - more harm than good. All those difficult conversation exercises (i.e. firing, saying no, telling people when they are not performing) prepared me well to handle all kinds of inter-personal situations thrown at me in an entrepreneurial life. I also learned the art of storytelling from Professor Jennifer Aaker and how neuroscience applies to marketing from Professor Baba Shiv. 

 

 

My last housemate, Henri, is this chic Parisian who at a younger age worked with a top party organizer in Europe to throw the highest profile parties in Paris.

He told me this story once that I remember to date:

One night, they were throwing a party hosted at a reserved room of a nightclub. At first, the attendance was sparse. Henri got worried. His partner said, “Don’t worry,” with a mischievous smile.  He asked the nightclub manager if they had a red velvet rope.

He then placed it right in front of the room. Henri’s eyes lighted up at the moment when he was retelling the story. “You would not believe what happened, Bea! It was magical!” People at the nightclub immediately started noticing this red velvet rope. They started looking around and asking about what’s happening inside the room. Next thing you know, a long line formed in front of this red velvet rope - a very long line that went on all night. The party later was voted one of the 10 most memorable parties of the decade in Europe.

Here’s another experience I encountered recently. At a party last Saturday, my cute and fashionable girl friend Janet got some compliments on her new shoes. Completely unaffiliated with Tieks, Janet then started giving this most amazing sales pitch for her Tieks shoes that most certainly convinced at least two guests to each spend ~$200 after the party! “They are a bit pricey, but I love them because these backs are super comfortable and don’t cut into my skin. I can wear them to work or at parties. And…you can fold them…” At this moment, Janet took off her Tieks, folded them into palm-sizes, turned around, and took out two stylish Tieks pouches from her handbag – one the size of a palm to hold the folded Tieks shoes and the other one to hold your stilettos while you are wearing the Tieks walking comfortably before changing into the stilettos as you step into an evening party.

“Wow!” Everyone was utterly impressed by the folded Tieks and these two unexpected but functional pouches. At that moment, she finished her sales pitch. A girl immediately said, “I love those teal rims too.” Janet smiled and agreed, “yeah, it’s their signature style.” All the other girls concurred enthusiastically. Next, each took turns trying out the Tieks and discussed which colors to choose.

The last story is about Bump Technologies, one of the most successful mobile applications. It allows you to exchange contact information by bumping two phones.

Its founder David came to speak to us at Lightspeed (where our startup is) on Monday. When asked how they gained viral adoption, David said that they adopted the “old-styled” viral marketing approach – getting people to tell each other about Bump in person, particularly at cocktail parties. Why was Bump able to do so? First, the application is social in nature – you use it to exchange contacts! Second, more importantly, it’s worthy as a cocktail conversation topic. Why so? It gives such a fun, unexpected experience, particularly to the first-time users.

In this age of social networking, the rule of games changes constantly as users are getting savvier social networking online. They are also constantly bombarded by new social applications. Facebook has cracked down on the fake virality of many spammy social applications which exploited the system in its early days. What I’ve learned firsthand from social game and other social developers is that it’s becoming harder and harder to get people to invite all of their Facebook friends or upload all of their email contacts to a new game or application. The old cheap viral approaches work less well now. So what can we learn from those three stories I shared?

1.       Humans desire what is harder to get. The red velvet rope was a symbol of exclusivity. People equate exclusivity with mystery. Mystery leads to desire. People also often equate exclusivity with quality. The best parties or events are exclusive. It’s a self-selection process. The open events tend to degenerate in quality because you can guess that not every attendee will be “special”. The noise factor turns off a lot of people, but disproportionately much more of the popular ones. These people have more alternatives and are more selective. It becomes a vicious cycle. The remaining popular people who attend become unimpressed and the next time around don’t go either. In the end, only those with fewer choices go to the public events. The same applies to all kinds of social networks. To build a good network, you need a few anchor stars – popular people, to attend. However, the popular people don’t want to attend a non-exclusive event because they are selective and often a bit snobbish. As a result, the best events are exclusive and people almost equate exclusivity with allure from experience. Isn’t this how Facebook started too (@harvard.edu)? Therefore, it’s super important to choose who your first users are. Sometimes, it’s better to opt for quality more than quantity especially at the beginning through exclusive invites. This particularly applies to platforms which depend on user-generated content. Once the red velvet rope is laid, the long line starts.

2.       Provide an unexpected experience to entertain and wow your customers. The old styled viral marketing spread through in-person conversations is in my opinion the strongest viral marketing tool a company can deploy in today’s cluttered market. An unexpected experience is entertaining and memorable. The wow moment of Tieks is when Janet took off her Tieks, folded them, and then took out the two beautiful Tieks shoe pouches almost magically from her handbag. The wow moment of Bump is the experience of bumping and getting the contact from the other person instantly. These wow moments made the “presenter” feel proud and want to evangelize them again. Thus, they became popular party topics. People leaving the party will remember it.  

3.       Mobile is inherently more social. Even if you are a consumer web business, try to build a memorable and party-worthy mobile experience because people can show it in person, wow their listeners, and make them remember. A visual experience is always much stronger than pure verbal descriptions. Imagine the difference between showing an iPhone and describing it just by words?

4.       Be authentic. You are not perfect. Recall how Janet started her sales pitch for Tieks? “They are a bit pricey, but…” She didn’t pretend that Tieks were perfect. In fact, she pointed out its weakness at the very beginning. However, it only made the pitch more authentic and believable.  

Finally, if you can tell a story, tell it to make your customers remember you. Humans are wired to remember and retell stories!

 

Lean startup is a refreshing principle that many small or large companies can learn from. However, I notice that many entrepreneurs blindly follow it without fully understanding the fine prints. They often fall into two traps with too strong a focus on “minimal” and “user testing”:

1.       Premature product release: We often see products today that are too minimal and prematurely die in their cradles when launched too early. The user experience is often too shallow. First impressions are so important! Many minimally viable products underwhelm people. Founders may form a wrong decision based on the lack of initial engagement as negative “validation”. Many mistakenly expect an overnight Facebook-styled hit or they kill the project. They also expect a TechCrunch mention to artificially grow the user base and seek funding. The result is, their user base shoots up and then rapidly declines. The more seasoned entrepreneurs even admit that they often can’t tell when they are just one tweak away from getting the product-market fit.

2.       Blindly following user feedback and data: Apple builds some of the best consumer tech products but its product approach is completely contrary to the lean startup philosophy. It releases fully fledged products that wow you with an unforgettable first impression. You fall in love and become a loyal evangelist. The product becomes truly viral. Secondly, designers rule at Apple. They make decisions sometimes despite what the users tell them. If they had followed what the users wanted like every other smartphone manufacturer, they would never have chosen to offer a keyboard-less smartphone. Users always want everything. As a result, your product may become a noisy bucket of features, a product built by consensus without a soul. Sometimes, the users don’t know what they want until they try it. A vision to see farther than your users still matters. Finally, your first users may not represent all potential users for your product. Naturally, the product attracts the subset who like you first release and stay on to give you feedback. Blindly following their feedback and usage data may cause you to lose other users who never even engage in the first place but otherwise could represent the more lucrative market.   

The consumer Internet and mobile market is particularly crowded today with dozens of startup solutions featured on TechCrunch, ReadWriteWeb and many other sites every day. The spoiled users are less forgiving now than 3-5 years ago. If they were unimpressed by your product the first time, it will be super difficult to win them back ever again. Here are three tips shared by some successful entrepreneurs:

Start small: It’s critical to start small. Get only a small group of people who will forgive you no matter what to try out your first product. Also be mindful of whom you want your ultimate users to be and choose your first users to best represent that. Iterate.  Gradually expand your user base from there.  

Don’t seek publicity too early: A successful entrepreneur in the social web space shared a key learning – don’t get too much buzz too early. It took them three years to get a featured article on New York Times which overnight brought millions more users most of whom have stayed on. They started with fan bloggers and other organic mentions. They also intentionally stayed away from TechCrunch but went for their core audience -  fashionistas. They don’t want the “fake users” who would try out everything mentioned on TechCrunch and then move on to the next shiny thing. They only went for high profile PR when they were confident enough about the product. This way, they also retained the more real users from day one who stayed on as great evangelists and content creators. Bad first impression can kill your product.

Don’t fall in love with media: As one of my favorite GSB professors, Professor Mark Leslie (ex-CEO of Veritas Software), warned us, never fall in love with media mentions of your company. First, you feed them what you want them to say. Then they say it. Finally, you clip what they said, frame it, and believe in it! How stupid is that. That’s the beginning of your failure.

 

Late last Saturday morning, I was lying in bed, enjoying my weekly dates with NPR’s “This American Life.”

It was a session about “Superpower” (http://bit.ly/nprsuperpower), in which a girl named Zora dreamed to become a wonder woman since the age of 5. To reach this goal, she made a list of all the skills needed to actually become a super hero and she mastered all of them by the age of 21.

Later at a party, my friend Tomas who listened to the same talk asked me what top 10 skills I wish to learn – not superpower but skills one can actually learn. It’s such a fun exercise. I encourage everyone to do this and maybe one day fulfill some or all of them!

Here’s the list I made for myself:

1.       Making people laugh: I would die for this skill. How fun would it be!

2.       Cooking: Cook like a top chef. Cooking combines relaxative meditation with artistic creation and social entertainment.  

3.       Computer hacking: I love how one can create something to change how people live or work, purely using software. I so wish to have majored in computer science and been able to hack anything! Now this wish may more likely be fulfilled through my partnership with Sid and Deepak, my brilliant co-founders from Stanford AI Lab. When I have more leisure time, I still would love to take CS classes!

4.       Violin: It's my favorite music instrument. I could only dream to play as beautifully as my friend Yohei Iwasaki at this age. It's the most unrealistic item on my list.

5.       Design: Having seen how great designers (my classmate Emily Ma and co-founder Jason) turn mundane matters into pure delights with a few simple changes, I wish to master the skill of creating beauty married with functionalities.

6.       Flying helicopters: Simply the coolest skill to have!

7.       Dancing: Dance like a star in every style.

8.       Photography: I enjoy oil painting. Now startup life has taken away such a time-consuming luxury. Photography would allow me to quickly capture beauties in my everyday life without requiring hours of time. It’s simply another outlet for artistic expression I’d love to master.

9.       Creative writing: I love the beauty of words.  How such simple alphabetical combinations stir imagination and create ideas.

10.   French: It’s my boyfriend’s native tongue. The French wrote great literature, and I like how it sounds.

What is your list? Make one today!

 

To answer Jean-Luc’s question, I can only speak from my own perspective as well as the women I know. Having worked in corporations and then chosen an entrepreneurial path, I think a woman entrepreneur is very different from a woman corporate executive, although they likely share something in common.

What do they share in common?

(1) A desire to compete and to be successful beyond family.

(2) View career success as a definition of success for women.

I hypothesize, purely based on observation, that men biologically tend to be more competitive to begin with.  They are hunters as cave men while women are caregivers at home in that traditional sense. Secondly, even when women are competitive, they may view success differently. What means success is influenced heavily by numerous factors. I focused on one powerful factor in my last blog: sex. There are other factors: family influence and societal influence. A Stanford GSB classmate/friend recently interviewed a dozen of her female classmates’ family backgrounds to observe patterns. There’re a wide range of socio-economic and cultural backgrounds among these girls but one theme is more common than any other: their parents tend to both work. The working mom and how the parents interact in the family set a strong role model for the daughter. Secondly, societal influence is huge. In Europe, for example, the society seems to value intelligence and independence in women as desirable traits more than some other societies, arguably more than the US or Japan. Europe and Canada also provide a better welfare system for women to become moms and still succeed in career. They receive more financial support and more time off to do their mother duties. As a result, we’ve seen more high-ranking women politician and executives in that continent. Finally, a woman entrepreneur needs to be very confident and comfortable about her personal life. If she has a sense of insecurity and feels the priority to lock down a husband before it becomes too late, she won't prioritize career pursuits.

While the first factor, sex, is likely the stickiest one to be changed, we can do a lot more on the latter two factors - family and societal influences to make more women entrepreneurs.

Personally, I’ve come to realize that independence is important even for my own personal life. I’ve heard too many horror stories of husbands openly cheating on wives while the wives don’t pursue divorce because they are financially dependent. Independence also gives a woman strength and makes her intriguing in the long run. You can’t keep a man intrigued with pure looks in the long run. Sex and relationship are ultimately a mind game. Being an interesting person is important.

The difference between a woman entrepreneur and corporate executive bears most similarities to the difference for men. I personally chose this path because I relish the process of creating a useful product for people in its purest form. There’s neither bureaucracy nor politics. The market, and not your boss, is your judge. I’m doing something not because I’m told to do so but have the freedom to decide purely based on logical analysis with my partners of what’s best for users. I have the opportunity to make a bigger impact than I otherwise could. I love the efficiency, creativity, freedom, potential, learning, and fair play involved. Having experienced both work in a corporation and an entrepreneurial setting, I can say I learn and get challenged a lot more as an entrepreneur. Do you enjoy learning and being challenged to the maximum of your capability? Entrepreneurship is an extreme sport!

Philosophically, I struggle with the identity of a corporate executive, primarily because money is not the biggest incentive for me. In a corporation like my former employer Microsoft, even though I did well I never felt I was essential to the company. I felt like a piece of dust on the wheel of a giant plane. It will go forward with or without me. Secondly, when I was polishing up internal powerpoint decks for a senior executive, I wasn’t convinced if I was doing my best to create value to this world. It seemed things could be much simplified but for political reasons had to be done the way they were.

Women often have a harder time breaking into this gentlemen’s club. Even if I became very successful and got promoted to become one of the many corporate vice presidents at Microsoft, I wouldn’t even feel so proud.  I dislike corporate politics or bureaucracy. I hate inefficiency but it seems unavoidable in corporations, no matter how well run they are. I would feel like a faceless figure in a crowd. 

In summary, I felt an existential crisis working in a corporation in my past life. I want to gain a position in this world the way I’d like to.

Finally, to answer the question of what it takes to make a woman corporate executive, I’m not the best person but I can make a guess here. I think they share the desire to be successful in career and to make an impact. However, they are often less risk taking and care more about leading people than the process of creating something from nothing. They don’t mind politics. They view it as a means to the end, whether that end is power or impact.  

 A final comment: While men are more driven to make money and become famous to be attractive, what's left for women gives them the luxury to pursue what they love and care less about money. This is great!

Disclaimer: Please don't take anything I say about men and women in a general sense too personally. Of course everyone is different. I'm speaking for the broad population.

Fred Wilson wrote a blog a few weeks ago called "XX Combinator," commenting on Teresa's earlier blog which proposes the founding of "XX Combinator" to support women entrepreneurs. 

Both blogs attracted a huge amount of feedback. Over the weekend, I also discussed this with a friend. The question is related to an old discussion at business school: why aren't the women graduates nearly as successful as their male classmates 10 years out of school on average?

The answer is very obvious. Freud is right, sex is the ultimate driver to explain most human behaviors. It's primordial but often the most powerful driver explaining human behaviors. Why do you do all these things to look good? To attract potential sex partners, consciously or subconsciously. Status is another way to stand above the crowd in this competition for partners. 

Success, wealth and power are typically the biggest attractive assets a man can have to impress beautiful partners. On the contrary, the same characteristics about a woman often have the opposite effect on men, threatening many men. Even after all the modern movements, as a dedicated female entrepreneur myself, I have to admit that men judge women using a totally different set of criteria - of which beauty and femininity are far more important than success or wealth.

Logically, men will do their best to maximize their success. They are willing to work extremely hard or live on a budget for 5-10 years to bet on success. Biologically, they can also afford to do this longer and still remain attractive at the age of 40-50.

For women, the price to be an entrepreneur is much higher and the return is not as attractive. First, the cost of maintenance is much higher for women - clothes, skin care, hair, shoes, etc. Second, working long hours in stressful conditions age a woman. Given beauty is often a more important criterion than success, women are less willing to make such a bet. Finally, women often need a partner before they reach the end of their safe childbearing ages, and that's typically before they reach 40. Once they have children, their life priorities also completely change. The societal expectation is still for a woman to spend more time to raise the children. Otherwise, they face the risk of divorce.

Another observation I had of the 700+ MBA classmates at Stanford Graduate School of Business is that these very smart and successful people often care much more than average people about how others perceive them. They are also competitive in maintaining the best external image, summarized in one word - attractiveness.

For girls at GSB, taking an entrepreneurial path right after the expensive school means financial uncertainty while your well-earning classmates lavish on travel, food, fashion, beauty or simply socializing leisure time. Few can stand such tradeoffs in personal lifestyles, especially when you are at the optimal age to find a partner. This also speaks true for many other young successful female professionals who could become entrepreneurs but have chosen not to.  

Such social dynamics are very difficult to change overnight, or ever. For thousands of years, men look for beautiful and young-looking women to bear their children and women look for powerful men who can well protect themselves and their children. Such an instinct has been imprinted into our unconsciousness. 

Beyond entrepreneurship, if you look at any career (except for fashion modeling or nursing), it's difficult to pick one where there are more successful women than men historically. Men often spend more energy on becoming successful in career.

However, women who remain serious about their career have a great advantage. Half of the consumers are female! It takes a woman to understand other women much more than a man. That's why Mark Pincus wants to hire more women at Zynga. 

How can we make more women successful? Without fundamental changes in how men and women perceive attractiveness, it will be difficult to change the status quo. XX Combinator won't change this. Media can play a big role. what about making the next "Carrie Bradshaw" a hardworking tech entrepreneur?

 

As an online fashion shopper for about 9 years, I'm summarizing my online fashion shopping experiences and thoughts below, and welcome your thoughts!

What I like most about online fashion shopping:

1) The selection and efficiency is unparalleled. Except for some haute couture items, most brands and stores now sell online. Instantly, you can simultaneously visit a UK shop, a Hong Kong shop, and a New York boutique online. They also have more sizes and styles available online, given the centralized warehouses for online purchases. Most importantly, it's time efficient. The time it takes to drive, park, walk, and manually filter products is saved. For busy professionals like me, this is the biggest draw. It also allows me to impulsively shop any time anywhere. Dangerous but wonderful for businesses. In comparison to looking at beautiful presentations of clothes on real models, offline shopping experience often result in unpleasant labor, like going through this rack:

2) Wear something unique. Unless you live in a big city where there are endless fashion choices, the brands in a small to mid-sized town are often limited. You risk wearing the same dress as the other girl in your office or class. I often get compliments for clothes I bought online, because my friends never saw them anywhere else. This particularly appeals to people who want to present an individualistic image. If you like LV, Gucci or Abercrombie, you are most likely well covered. However, if you are the one who likes to dig individual brands and boutique shops, online shopping better suits you.

3) Don't know how to match the dress? Some shopping sites make smart recommendations. Not only do most well built fashion shopping sites allow you to easily filter by size, price, color, type, style, and brand, they also have these personalized recommendations for matching shoes and accessories, or other clothing items of the similar styles once they learn what you like. These are great shopping aids.

4) Never miss a sale again! I recently met an entrepreneur who built a small but useful site: shoppingnotes.com. Its simple concept is to monitor the price of an online fashion item and alert you by email when it goes on sale. I love it and even wish that they do it offline as well!

What I dislike about online fashion shopping - read closely as there may be a business opportunity here :)

1) You do not get to try it out or even touch it. Yesterday, I just returned a dress I purchased online. It looked better on the model on the website than the actual product. What really turned me off about this dress was its fabric, which felt synthetic and uninspiring. This is the worst problem with online shopping. You can't touch it. You can't try it. Most models have perfect bodies so clothes always fit them well. Women in the real world have different body types and sometimes have trouble figuring out if the items fit their body types. How do I compensate this problem today? I tend to buy from trusted brands or stores to avoid quality problems. For example, Diane von Furstenberg and Stuart Weitzman are two of my favorite premium brands. I have not returned an item I purchased from either brand. Modcloth.com and etsy.com are two emerging ecommerce sites which sell fashion items made by independent artists or designers. I've made purchases at both sites - the result is mixed. Some I liked (but not loved), and others, I had to return. It does make me hesitate to buy more from these two sites. Over time, I've built trust with several online fashion retailers, such as shopbop.com and yoox.com. Interestingly, having clothes on real attractive models matters a lot. I have bought few items from bluefly.com, because it dresses its inventories on stale mannequins, whereas shopbop has attractive models wearing them. The best is Asos.com - they even shoot a short runway video of the model wearing the piece walking. It really gives you a feel of how it looks on a real, moving person. Secondly, I carefully check the size chart and the materials of the items. Don't just look at the picture. Do read the descriptions and specs! 

2) Sometimes, there're simply too many options. As someone famous once said, you get a headache when you are given 100 choices but enjoy it when you only have to choose 1 among 3 options. The problem with online fashion shopping is that I get tired of scanning too many options, especially with the aid of modern technology tools, such as polyvore.com, like.com, and shopittome.com, stylous.com, among others. When you are overwhelmed with options, you often get so confused that you can't even make a decision. At least, it's been my personal experience. I want fewer but smarter options. Whoever can figure out a way to smartly narrow down your options for you will become a major winner in the space. A "pandora" like shopping experience that understands my style or suggests clothes based on what I'm thinking about through the hint of a piece would be the holy grail. Even better, it may act as a a smart stylist to suggest a new style that may suit me, as I'm always looking to refresh my looks! Many shopping sites ignore this but the look and feel of the online shopping site matters significantly for fashion. That's why I never buy anything using the standard comparison shopping sites. You want to provide a "luxurious" experience online - not a Walmart! 

 

Finally, many have talked about the idea of "social shopping" to imitate the offline experience for girlfriends who go shopping together. To be honest, I prefer shopping by myself than with friends, because I don't feel pressured to hurry when others are waiting. That's also one of the reasons I like shopping online. No peer pressure on timing, etc. However, I do admire certain friends' styles and want to know what other items they would recommend to me or consider for themselves.   

Yesterday, I felt the need to upgrade my wardrobe with a few new dresses. In the past few years, I have gradually migrated my fashion shopping habits online. However, when I shopped online, I felt guilty that I wasn’t “shopping” properly without even trying out clothes. Therefore, I decided to shop “properly” yesterday by physically visiting the various department stores as well as brand shops around SF Union Square.

Having not shopped in physical stores for months, I soon realized how impatient and irritated I became of the offline shopping experience. The selection is smaller and I can no longer filter down the items by a few simple clicks. I missed the comfort of scanning hundreds of filtered items on my couch in a matter of a few minutes. The worst part came when I found the dresses I liked – I had to wait for an assistant’s attention, tell him/her my size, and pray that the size is still available. Sometimes, I had to search through the racks. It's hard to believe technology hasn't done much to improve the modern fashion shopping experience. After 6 hours of laborious “shopping” around the various shops, I went home without a single dress I liked.

As soon as I got home, I turned on the computer, and started surfing the various shopping and aggregation sites I frequent – shopbop.com, topshop.com, asos.com, yoox.com, bluefly.com, modcloth.com, bloomingdales.com, etc. and by the way, more are waiting in my gmail box from Gilt Groupe! Within an hour, I purchased 4 dresses! If I need some inspiration, I can visit polyvore.com or style.com, along with many other fashionistas’ blog sites!

Someone may argue how I would know if the clothes fit me? yes, it has happened when I had to return some pieces. First, it didn't happen often. Only 1 in 5 times would I return an item. Even when I did so, the process was so painless that it was still worthwhile the time I saved driving, parking, walking, and manually filtering items the ways I wanted. 

To me, the winner is clear - online shopping! 

In my next blog, I will analyze my online fashion shopping joy and pain.